SALES are the Lady In Red of Retail.

50% OFF! COME BUY FROM US!

NO! 55% OFF! COME TO US! 

NO NO NO! 75% OFF! COME! COOOME! 

(Terms and Conditions Apply)

We're all quite familiar with these slogans. They're what make us go nuts and and bat-shiz-crazy when we go out shopping. Men, you do it too, though not necessarily for the same stores. What makes us behave this way? After going into countless shops advertising "BIG SALES" on large red posters only to find that their ideas of sales are raising prices and then slashing them down to original prices, we walk out empty-handed and STILL enter another pointless flashy sale. WHY does it not get into our thick, massive skulls that SALES. ARE. BULL. They're fakes! 

Middle Eastern Chick will provide you with an analogy: The Lady In Red. Who is she? Let Middle Eastern Chick tell you. She is that mysteriously sexy, red-clad woman that will turn heads wherever she goes. She is the woman who can seduce a man without even trying. She is the woman who can tame a man by glaring at him. She is the woman who can turn a man into putty by giving him a smoldering look. SHE is the woman that every other woman wants to be. Now, what do sales and the Lady In Red have in common? Hmm... let's see... 

Oh! Middle Eastern Chick knows! Is it their flashy red exterior? Well, that's one thing, but it's not the main thing. Okay, is it their cheap exterior? That was a low blow... but let's let that one slide. Okay, is it their ability to attract attention come rain, storm, snow, hail or even friggin' lava? Hmm... close. Is it their ability to attract and then ruthlessly put people down? Huh... maybe. Or is it the fact that they're all red hot on the outside but downright trashy on the inside? Yeah, we like that one. 

In fact, it's all of them. The Lady In Red is known to symbolize temptation, and SALES are pretty much the epitome of temptation for a shopper. Too bad they're both just flashy exteriors and rubbish interiors. Let Middle Eastern Chick explain, using one more example, how a SALE is like a Lady In Red. Okay, a SALE will draw you in, giving you unreasonable expectations, quickly giving you a high and leaving you waiting for that perfect buy; but, in the end, you get crushed, realising that all the stuff on sale is pure trash and you walk out empty handed. A Lady In Red, similarly, will ignite your interest (especially for men, unless she- or you- happens to bat for the other team), draw you in and entrance you with her flawless looks and mysterious nature. Just when you're hoping for a little bit more, checking your breath and quickly flashing your teeth on the back of a spoon, she gives you a devilish smile and walks away. There you are, standing like a moron, still checking your teeth on the back of a spoon, only to look up and realise that you're standing alone in the middle of nowhere, possibly even with your wallet missing (if you happen to be really unlucky... and stupid).

So there you have it, SALES are the Ladies in Red of retail. You best watch out... otherwise someday, one of these teases might just take you for a ride that you'll never forget and forgive yourself for. Like the day Middle Eastern Chick bought a dress on "sale" that was probably more expensive than her whole wardrobe put together. 

She kids, she kids. It was a skirt.

MEChick is going to go ahead and use a picture that says "Shutterstock" all over it, because she's just bad-ass like that. Total rebel. 

All Smiles!... Or Not.

I read a very interesting newspaper article a while back. Turns out that according to a study carried out in University of British Columbia, women find brooding men sexier than men who smile all the time; and men find smiling women sexier than those who, well, don't smile.

The men part, I can understand. It's a well known thing that the brooding, reserved hotshots are the ones who make women weak in the knees. Some good examples are Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca, the dude from Gone With the Wind, the dude from My Fair Lady, the dude from Funny Face, and the list goes on (don't ask me why I decided to pick all the old movies... they're classics and better than a lot of the over-hormonal rubbish we see nowadays). One really good example that supports this hypothesis can be found in the movie Pretty In Pink. Remember that one? (Also, don't ask me why I'm talking like a grandmother who actually lived in the time of Audrey Hepburn and is hating on today's youth. I guess I'm just a very different teenager...) In Pretty In Pink, the main girl, Andie, goes for the brooding and slightly mysterious Blane rather than Duckie, her awesome, always smiling and dancing (remember the record shop scene? My favourite!) best friend who was in love with her.

You can guess which one this is. 

There are however exceptions... Sometimes the girl might find the brooding guy sexy but will eventually go with the guy who makes her laugh. I'd do that. Most of the guys I've had huge crushes on are hilarious! The other, more quiet ones are hot, but I got tired of them pretty quickly.

The study about women has left me a little confused. I completely understand why men would find smiling women more attractive, but what I don't understand is why teenage girls STILL choose to give up their pretty smiles for the weird pouts that they always choose to do in photographs??? Wide bright smiles are great, half smiles are cute too, no smile is a little sad but a pout is just... weird. I mean, if you pout once in a while, that's great. But IN EVERY SINGLE PICTURE? I mean, don't their lips hurt after a while?? It's like they're constantly in kiss-mode! I don't mean to hate on anybody who does this... I just find it a little strange that you would want to hide your smiles! Show the world that you're happy! Smile! Be confident!

I know some girls who pout in all their pictures because they want to attract the guys. Well, nothing attracts a guy more than confidence and positivity; and now, this study proves it! *Wink*

Study Motivation.

So... I've a hit a bit of a low. I have four exams left this week and I REALLY am not in the mood to study. Therefore, I shall Tweet or Blog every time I finish a significant amount of studying!

I remember last year when my method of study motivation was to French manicure one finger nail for every chapter I studied. See?! CREATIVE STUDY! >=D

Hunk of Beef vs Twinkle Toes

I just watched a video that made me feel like a hunk of beef. It's not everyday that you end up feeling like that...

I watched Boyanka Angelova's 2008 routine and literally felt like I was a human gone wrong. I mean, if humans have the ability to move like her, then something must be wrong with the rest of us who can't! It must be a deficiency disease... Flexilacktoesis (see if you can figure that one out).

I watched her move, utterly mesmerized by the way she carried herself (and that ball!) with the ease of a person wading through a baby's paddle-pool. As much as I felt elated by the grace and beauty of her routine, I also felt downright terrible for myself. Ugh... self pity is such a tedious thing. I literally felt like a great big hunk of beef with fat globules squelching at my sides and oil dripping down my meaty flesh. Ew. I just disgusted myself.

Of course, things aren't nearly as bad as we perceive them to be. I suppose my feeling of beefiness at this point will just vanish after a dose of reassurance and self-confidence. Thus, we have the vicious cycle of self-pity and... well... something less than self-pity.

Here's the video... the frying pan of my beefiness:

Body Shop Campaign

Women are always expected to be flawless Goddesses, and you know what, we ARE Goddesses. Flawless is a notion that we go out of our way to focus on, when actually, it’s elusive. It is something that none of us will ever be, because that way, we’d all be like Barbie: plastic, identical, breakable and we’d topple over. I think we should change our perspectives and see the “flawless” notion as the enemy, because that’s one thing we should strive NOT to be. Who wants to be an air-head who looks like every other air-head around them? We are beautiful in and out and nobody can tell us otherwise. We are Goddesses in our own skins. 


The controversy behind this campaign is something that I cannot even begin to comprehend? So, it's okay for Playboy magazine to publish photoshopped nude pictures of "perfect" women and it's okay for every little girl to have a disproportionate and sexually manipulated Barbie, but it's not okay to show the world what the perception of a real woman should be?